Whilst it has never been all that high on my list of priorities, I do have to admit, I am fairly open minded and am prepared to try most things once (apart, of course, from Morris Dancing and Incest!)
It was with this open attitude that I approached How to marry a Frenchman.
How to marry a Frenchman is Madame Bouron’s blog about her life (with her husband, of course) in Paris.
Now, to some of you it might seem a little bit unfair that I am reviewing 2 girls from Seattle, now living in Paris, in the same week.
Well, I have to let you into a little secret (and don’t tell anyone!), I’m on commission!
The Seattle Board of International Affairs has asked me to keep an eye on it’s favourite daughters, the news of which is doubtless going to cause sleepless nights for any other bloggers from Seattle currently living in Paris!
Moving swiftly on….
Lets start off with the Metro bits….
In three separate posts, Madame Bouron manages to cover a range of diverse subjects that she has experienced during her hours of people watching on the Paris Metro.
She starts with privacy on the metro (and don’t even think about trying top hide your phone conversation behind a scarf. Madame Bouron will just cuddle up next to you to better eves drop on your private conversation!)
Then she hurries onto a detailed discussion (and handy guide) on how Non-Parisians can offend Parisians on the metro. This should be required reading for all tourists and newly arrived expats (although I expect all those girlies from Seattle know all this stuff already; you know how they like to gossip!)
I did like the bit at the end where she explains that it is permissible to elbow tourists and children on the Metro. I’ll have to pay a visit!
The third post discusses the direct correlation between a population’s IQ and the availability of well lit public transportation. Well, as long as you cull out all the children and tourists, I’d have to agree!
What about the foodie bits?
Surely there must be something to eat here?
Well, Madame Bouron starts off by asking a simple question and then, strangely enough, getting the answer completely wrong!
In my world, were someone to ask me… How much soufflé is too much soufflé? I’d have to be honest and say…. “Keep bringing the soufflé until I burst.. and then bring me a doggie bag to take some home as well!”
Madame Bouron, on the other hand just says… “One soufflé per meal.” How strange?
And then she has the gall to complain that there’s a snail in her salad!
The cheek of it! I bet the chef personally hand picked that added protein for her!
Madame Bouron does have the right idea about crêpes though. In Better off alone… she explains that with crêpes, just as with business, the simpler it is, the better it is!
And finally we get on to the bit that I’ve been waiting for… Thigh Highs and Garter Belts!
Yes! At long last! A Lingerie Post! And from one of those Paris bloggers! You know what they say about them!
And I’m all for replacing maternity tights (whatever they are) with some Leather and Lingerie!
Oh, la la!
The having a baby bits…..
I wouldn’t normally cover the having a baby bits as I find them frighteningly internal and biological and I always used to faint in Biology lessons (until one day, the Biology teacher suggested that the next time I fainted, they’d use me for dissection practice – it was a tough school! – so I changed to Chemistry instead!)
However, Madam Bouron seems to be adept at avoiding all the bits that I don’t want to know about so I’ll mention some of her posts here.
Like the one where she says.. Do NOT get fat! Cravings will not be tolerated!
Fair enough… But I’m not even pregnant so…. does that apply to me?
She then moves on to The Dos and Don’ts of a French Pregnancy. Wine and cigarettes are allowed. Eating cat’s poo and rare meat is not!
Oh dear, that’s a shame….. But I’m not even pregnant so…. does that apply to me?
Now on to the toilet bits….
Paris being the City of Dog Poo, I expected lots of toilet related posts.
And I do have to admit to being a little disappointed!
We start off with Indigestion and other French Conversation Starters and swiftly move on to the strangely named French Kissing and American Sandwiches which is, of course, all about Turkish Toilets!
I was, in a strange and rather worrying way, cheered up to find that an article entitled Balls had nothing to do with Madame Bourod (and American of the Female Persuasion, no less) attempting to explain the offside rule but was, instead about testicles.
Moving swiftly alone to more child friendly matters….
Scolding is, I find, rather good for children (although many would consider it not to be too friendly; although, of course, I do disagree.) and there is a great article about this French national pastime here.
So, Summing up…..
If you want to know a bit more about Madame Bouron and hear some of her advice about life in Paris you should really take a look at How to marry a Frenchman even if, like me, you are never likely to do so (marry a Frenchman, that is!)
You could always prepare yourself first by taking a quick peek at Our Story which gives you all that luvvy duvvy romantic stuff!
Or do a little bit of people watching first – there’s a great guide at Glaring is Caring.
And me? Well, deeply hidden in a post, ambiguously named Beauty Secrets, there is some vital information and I’m going to try it out!
Well, if “All women should be able to pee while keeping time to the Marseillaise” I think all men should be able to do the same! Fair’s fair, after all.
Wish me luck!
All the best
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